Word of Wisdom Jokes

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Smokey the Bear and Holy the Ghost

A woman walked up to a little old man rocking in a chair on his porch. "I couldn't help noticing how happy you look," she said. "What's your secret for a long happy life?"

"I smoke three packs of cigarettes a day," he said. "I also drink a case of whiskey a week, eat fatty foods, and never exercise."

"That's amazing," the woman said. "How old are you?'

"Twenty-six," he said.


One of our mission presidents said that he had a granddaughter who was riding on the bus. She was sitting by her mother. The man across the aisle was smoking up a storm. The little girl watched as long as she could stand it; then she got up, went over, and sat down beside him. She stared at him with a steely gray glare, then said,

"You should not smoke."

The man took the cigarette out of his mouth and firmly said to this little girl,

"Says who?"

She responded,

"Smokey the bear and Holy the Ghost."

Vaughn J. Featherstone